I get it, you may have mixed feelings about starting couples therapy. Sometimes it feels easier to jump ship from the relationship or pretend that everything is fine even though you may be feeling afraid, bored, misunderstood, lonely, a lack of trust, a lack of sexual desire or really really mad. Change may feel impossible but getting support from a skilled therapist can be a big relief.
I have done extended training working with couples. This work is the reason I became a therapist. I survived multiple divorces as a child and now I am married with children of my own so am on a quest to understand modern relationships, why they are so hard and help couples thrive. See more about my training here.
If relationships are hard for you there is nothing unusual or wrong about you. That may be a shock but we expect radically different things today from partners than our parents did. Most of us have had ZERO models for how to meet the expectations of today’s relationships. Relationships from yesteryear were about duty not long term love and intimacy. So if you choose to work with me or someone else, I hope you choose to work with someone. If I am not a match, call me anyway and I will help you find someone. Need a little cheer leading? Here is a video I have done called Couples Therapy Rocks and Everyone Should Do It!
Over half the couples I do see or have seen have been in couples therapy before and they repeatedly tell me that,
The way you work is totally different than anything we have experienced. We did more than talk about change we actually changed in sessions.
What makes my couples therapy work unique is that I leverage all the newest research on attachment and the brain and artfully combine it with my own training in body-centered therapy to get out of the “talking about our latest fight” kind of therapy that almost never works. I am also totally on your side, collaborating with you about what you want your relationship to look like and what kind of partner you want to be. You will practice relating from your wise adult self rather than from the adaptations you made as a child growing up. If you are;
- Straight or Gay
- Suffering through the pain of infidelity
- Fighting all the time
- Feeling disconnected
- Wishing you desired your partner sexually but don’t any longer
- Wanting to build a good foundation for marriage or commitment
- then I hope you will give me a call or schedule an appointment to see if my personality and style is a fit for you. You can schedule a first appointment or a phone call to ask any questions you have by accessing my online calendar here or ring me directly on 415-520-5567.
Additional Articles on Relationships and Couples Therapy:
“You Matter to Me!”: Why Relationships Get Hard and What To Do About I
Why Couples Therapy Rocks and Why Everyone Should Go!
Are Marriage and Sex Compatible?
Men in Psychotherapy Left Out of the Conversation?
Is “Friending” Your Ex On Facebook A Good Idea?